I’ve been questioning a lot lately; about this God, who I believe is real, and about this Christian sub-culture that I’ve grown up and live in. I am not questioning the reality of either, but am questioning what to do with it. Tell me, how do you react to reality? I’ve always been slow to accept and will cautiously process from a distance until I’m completely certain myself. Though I have made some major steps over the years, there are still steps I hesitate to take.
I look at this God, who they tell me speaks in a still and small voice, and who tells me to Go, Follow Me, and Come and see. The space between the command and my answer is the space that I always return too. Which is the right path? There is a path which I have taken before; and it is labelled ‘Insular Christianity’. It’s my own personal Christian sub-culture where we can nod at the word Go but leave it at that. We go to our church service, talk only to our friends, and as godly young men and women only consume objects defined as ‘Christian’ in our consumer market. We go to our church faithfully, praise Jesus, talk about those who are lost or hurt or vulnerable and how we may help. Yet none of these plans come to pass. We talk and do nothing. God says Go, and we go straight to our comfortable Christian sub-culture bubble. This is insular Christianity, where the word Go means to hide.
I have done all of this before. I do all of these activities. I am not saying that these activities in themselves are bad or even unhelpful. Many of these activities are good and important even, but I am questioning the way that we use these activities, the way I use these activities. Am I hiding in the bustle of doing good works and doing good things? Moreover, I look again at this God, who commands quietly Go, who was a homeless preacher who was friendly with the godliest of men to the wickedest of men. Often, my insular Christianity at least, looks far different from that.
My comfort and my selfish desires have always beaten Go. I have hesitated in roads of fears and weaknesses when faced with Follow Me. These are the issues that we ignore in our insular Christian bubble. These are issues that we justify. However, Christianity means complete trust and obedience in Jesus and sometimes I wonder if we’re trying to avoid that in our insular Christianity?
I know for myself at least, that it is time to get up at the word Go; and I’m back here again in the space between the command and my response. The space between the command and my response is the space that I always return to. I know the right path, though I’m not quite sure what to look out for. I look to this God who not only says Go but promises that He will guide the way. So tentatively, I begin to pick up my feet towards the possible direction of Go.