Hey there. Rachel here. As is the holiday tradition, Savvy and I join forces to bring you a delightful taste of both of our writing in ONE blog post. It’s like inception but for blogs.
Helpful tip: Savvy’s words are in italics and mine (Rachel) are in roman type.
Savvy (who is newly twenty-three! Cue that Blink-182 song) and I a.k.a. Rachel a.k.a. twenty-two (cue that Taylor Swift song, obvs) have agreed that we, Savvy and Rachel, have, well, experienced A LOT of change this past year. A lot. And we’re not even old enough to rent a car yet (in America, that is).
So, without further ado, here are five things that changed for Savvy and five things that changed for Rachel in the past year. If you add five and five, that makes ten.
1. Savvy made a big decision. Near the beginning of this year, I had an opportunity to possibly go back to California and have that as a home base for me. It was an incredibly hard and emotional decision which involved me coming to terms with the past. I’ve always been asked, theoretically of course, whether or not I would choose living in the States or in the UK. I made that theoretical decision for real. England is officially my home base.
2. Rachel got a driver’s license. For those of you not living in England and are instead bearing with America’s sprawlingness and lack of public transportation—bar the cities, of course—you understand how monumental it is to have that handy-dandy license. It’s almost been a full year but the taste of freedom is still so sweet.
3. Savvy is going to help plant a church near the Norfolk Coast. From that big decision of making England my home base, came this decision to be part of a church-planting team. I have to graduate from the Open University first, then I’m committed to at least a year of moving and living in a small town on the coast (I’m going to live your dream, Rachel, of living near the beach) and helping with the practicalities of planting a church from scratch.
4. Rachel moved to Florida. (Psst…I wrote about it here.) I left the cozy comforts of rural Massachusetts to brave the wilds of central Florida. Lemme tell ya, it’s been an adventure. Eating curry on rooftops. Contemplatively walking on the beach. Jumping in swimming pools when it’s not quite warm enough. Longboarding down red-brick roads. Overall, all I have to say to you, Florida, is (read in Carly Rae Jepsen voice) I really, really, really, really, really, really like you.
5. Savvy is no longer anti-church. I’ve written a little bit about how I struggle in church (feel free to read this and this). And yes, I realise how ironic my struggle is in light of this new decision (see #3) that I’ve just made. This year however, my attitude towards church has changed and it has been something that I am constantly re-evaluating. The way I relate to church has now changed and is still in the process of changing.
6. Rachel got a job. I don’t mean to brag but uh (cough, cough) my résumé’s bigger than yours. I am now a bona fide publicist at a Christian publishing house. Thenk ye, thenk ye vera’ much.
7. Savvy has learned to deal with idiots and jerks. oh my gosh, I’ve dealt with so many difficult people this year. I’ve been yelled at by irate old men in coffee-shops and been intimidated by creepy men, but I dealt with it and moved on. I’ve learned to speak up, say ‘no,’ and tell other people in order to protect myself and my sanity. I’m a sensitive person by nature and honestly I just want people to love me (love me please). However, I’ve learned and am simultaneously learning to protect myself as well as to love these people still and not become bitter towards them.
8. Rachel got her own apartment. Read all about it here! I don’t know what got into me. What extroverted, noise-seeking, introspection-averse, emotion-suppressing social butterfly such as myself (I see you rolling your eyes) would get an apartment all by herself. It’s a whole new level of crazy but I don’t regret it for a minute. WAIT…hold up…yes, still not regretting it.
9. Savvy has learned to take care of herself. I’ve had a lot of difficult circumstances this year. Because of everything that has been going on, my mental and even physical health at times has been low. I’ve learned that I need to take care of myself so I can continue to care for other people. It is not selfish of me to take care of my physical and mental health.
10. Rachel became single! After two and a half years of being in a relationship, all I can say is: Everybody. Put up your hands. Say I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love. (Good Charlotte, anyone?). Just kidding. In all seriousness, my heart is content. I am married to Jesus. Now where did I put my wine?
Okay, so here’s the deal. I’ve changed but not in the visible, in-your-face way. My life looks similar. Still a student, still a nanny, and still the American/English hybrid. However, I feel like a completely different person than I was a year ago. I have changed. These changes are positive even though they have involved painful processes. Mental obstacles were overcome and my mind is more resolved in what I want and have to do. I have moved on, let go, and I’m headed towards a new direction which is both scary and exciting.
Change doesn’t have to be obvious and it’s okay to be thankful for the change that not many people see. I see the change in me and I’m thankful; ready to move on. I see the big and visible changes in your life, Rachel, and I’m so thankful for you and the person that you are and you are becoming.
Awwww, my dear, dear Savvy. On a last note, love, I know that we are an ocean apart. But I like to think that the magic of this blog is bearing witness to all our fluctuating beliefs and struggles and thoughts. To quote The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (American usage of pants, please):
“It would be easy to say that the pants [replace “pants” with “blog”] changed everything….But looking back now, I feel like our lives changed because they had to, and the real magic of the
pantsblog was in bearing witness to all of this and in somehow holding us together when it felt like nothing would ever be the same again.”
Through all the changes, all the dramatic life plot twists, all the phrustrated philosophizing, rest assured, Savvy, that you are my best friend. And I’m not going anywhere ❤ Happy Christmas, love. – Rachel
Merry Christmas, my lovely. You’re my best friend too. ❤ -Savvy